Geargals

Whoa. Does this thing perform. It weighs almost nothing, it is freakishly warm, completely waterproof, and perfectly cut. I don’t know who’s at the helm of Mountain Hardwear design this summer, but I’d like to buy you a drink, my friend. Everything upper-body fits me perfectly this year. Lower body – well, you owe ME a drink. More on that in other posts, I’m sure. But still – credit needs to be given where due for the flattering slim yet forgiving cut, roomy-but-somehow-trim sleeves, and absolutely heavenly tops-of-hipbones length. Don’t change a thing, this cut deserves an Oscar! A Nobel Prize! Something really good, anyway.

Anyway, the Stimulus is my go-to jacket for summertime. I don’t think it’s even made it back to the hanger – once I got over how delicate it is! This is not a tough item. I know, I know, “superlight” does not equal abuse-proof. But man, was I bummed when I tore the Stimulus the very first time I wore it. Lame! Okay, so I was climbing a tree, so when you’re innocently minding your own business and are suddenly set upon by a charging bear and have to climb a tree to escape, do not expect your Stimulus to survive the experience. That’s not why I was climbing the tree, but that’s neither here nor there.

With a little of that Alaskan staple, duct tape, and a little seam sealer, my Stimulus is back to being waterproof. But at $150+, I wouldn’t want to risk going anywhere near bushes, trees, shrubs, sticks, rocks, car doors, or corners, so it’s your call. Not to downplay the excellent performance of this piece, but this is one expensive windbreaker, people. For above-treeline pursuits, you won’t need anything else for midsummer day hikes – I know, you won’t believe that, but it’s true. Honestly, I don’t even bother bringing another jacket anymore unless it’s under 50 degrees outside. If you conduct all of your below-treeline workouts on 30 foot-wide trails (you laugh, but you haven’t seen the ski “trails” around here), the Stimulus is for you.

Speaking of duct tape, though, I think the color of the Stimulus is noteworthy. It is blessedly not neon green, turquoise, dandelion, electric blue, or orangey-red. It is almost exactly duct tape colored. Really handy when making repairs, for certain, but also a welcome relief from the fashion-driven color schemes this year. It’s not that handy when you want to make yourself visible, but honestly I love the understated grey. Whatever happened to normal colors like grey and brown and black? Or even, you know, “red” or “blue”? Am I the only one who doesn’t want to dress like a Hyperdry t-shirt (remember those)? It seems like all the manufacturers get together every year to decide on the three colors they all going to offer. None of them can break this lockstep or something bad will happen (kind of like if the Lost castaways stop typing in those numbers! Yes, I’m a few seasons behind). If you buy shoes and a jacket in the same year they’ll probably end up being the same color. I feel like an idiot riding along in a supercoordinated set of clothing that ends up looking like an “outfit” even when I didn’t intend to dress so matchy-matchy. Anyway, big thumbs up to the grey color. It matches most stuff but not in a “matchy” way. I will warn you, though, I will get mighty suspicious if everyone shows grey-colored clothing next year….